Well, Then There's You.

Alone; I walked and I walked. Under the rain, by stores, by people, by the strangling atmosphere of expectations and denial. It's difficult this life is. As was written well by her, we take up space on this earth. I feel I take much less space than others though. I just feel that way and it's unexplainable. I cannot understand existence, and destiny and how I wish I could match the dots of all these difficult-in understanding words. I owned the path. I walked with myself walking ahead first. I followed me and this had caused a strange sense of confidence knowing you're hidden behind yourself and nobody get's to see you yet say anything but they can, except it won't reach you. Only when I stepped in front did everything change. Voices with matching stares were all over and I was once more center stage of the proceeding trial of being everything but worldly. I'm trying I tell in my defense! But the jury has a thing against me. I noticed this. It's been awhile and I don't get why they feel that way about me but they certainly do. So this happens before the mirror of truth. In fact, all mirrors are of truth. Except I've seen one once in a restaurant where it makes reflected images smaller than they really are. BANG. I'm sentenced to a lifelong punishment of la dépression. Dead end on the left, and on the right. I go straight but the road never ends. I can't turn back or I'd get lost. I can choose to sit or stand here but that requires more guts and I'm not quite ready for that yet. Open the doors, open all of it. I would like the chance to choose my practice, my entrée. Note to self, choices are never really ours. They belong to the world, from the point of creation because everything is touched. It's the ripple effect. We make up what was made up in the beginning. I just know it but it's best if such things are left unsaid. Now as for the title, it's bothering me. She. You. All the same. Just one big happy sadistic family with me playing victim. Girl you're right right now, and I just want to be what you want to be; happy.