Quite Truthful.

Repeatedly my mistakes are made, with little conscious effort of seeing them not as they are. A deliberate attempt of stupid to overcome what I suspect is depression, of course to no avid. Why are times the same? With certainty, the absent of change. Easy it is to be complacent, but to choose the strive for growth (in all aspects), is by far, a part definition of living, and thus the very most challenging process. The view of the future merely is a goal, most of which cannot be achieved overnight. What can though, is the believe that the smallest steps can move the greatest mountains, with the blessings of Time, and Life.

I judge, and have been judged. For all have different ideas on rights and wrongs, whether fashion or decision. I have been, yet again, am at a point of a crossroad. My choice is simply determined by my feelings. Everybody wants that better feeling in life, or they should want for those otherwise. Will it be the better choice, now that shall be considered if regret appears.

If, and regret. If is half real, and regret is dreaded.

Reality here seems wish-wash, imaginations real.

Left Back On Intentions.

How can one person be so ungrateful to all that has ever been said or done for? I have been nothing but nice. I am always the person with the most humility, and no care for material possessions. I have offered the most I can. Yet be treated back with such little appreciation, in fact complete isolation. I am angry, and upset to be treated this way. I wish everything for the very best to happen but probably been gossiped back in return with false accusations. I pray karma satisfy my vengeance.

Pissed.

Fucking mad of the all that is. The fact of imperfection is eating me out. Everything is being scrutinized to its finest detail. I want to exist elsewhere. I want all to end and to begin anew. Let this warfare win with the deserving change. For fucks sake.

Oil, Should Lack Ripples.

A lamp of oil held by the left hand shall symbolize peace of the state of mind and heart.

A sun held by the right hand shall symbolize the size of passions in life.

For one to obtain serenity in one's soul, one must always keep that lamp steady in the left hand of one's heart. No pressure of mind, or emotions, shall be granted a chance to affect the firm grip of that positioned hand. The hand simply must not move.

The sun pictured passion in one's life shall be attended to closely with both eyes on its size. If the passion grows overwhelmingly, its fire may catch the lamp filled oil which would be grave even to the imagination.

All shall be kept consistently, carefully, and most important lovingly. It is not a chore, nor a duty, merely a will from a choice made.

- The Hidden Words of Bahá’u’lláh

"Whither can a lover go but to the land of his beloved? And what seeker findeth rest away from his heart's desire? To the true lover reunion is life, and separation is death. His breast is void of patience and his heart hath no peace. A myriad lives he would forsake to hasten to the abode of his beloved."